The Usual Characters
by underhandlilies
Summary: Ebenezer Scrooge and the Grinch don't shop like normal people. Angeal is possibly the stingiest man in Midgar...but Sephiroth is the grumpiest. Angeal/Sephiroth. Written for proj-ff7xmas on Livejournal.


**Genres: **Romance and Humor ftw!

**Special Conditions: **ANGEAL/SEPHIROTH HECK YES. Been obsessed with this pairing for months, but this is the first one I've written. :D

**How the Idea was created: **I watched and fell in love with "How the Grinch Stole Christmas". Again. I hadn't watched it since I was a kid.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Final Fantasy VII or the characters within it. I am gaining no profit from this work of fan-fiction.

**Warnings: **Grouchiness towards Christmas.

**._._._.**

**The Usual Characters **

**A Traditional Character'd Final Fantasy VII Christmas Fan-Fiction**

**._._._.**

The only problem with dating Angeal was that he was the stingiest man in the whole of Midgar.

But then again, that was totally cool, because Sephiroth was possibly the grumpiest.

Their day started when Angeal pinned Sephiroth to the bed, grunting something in his sleep. Sephiroth woke up with a scowl, immediately trying to shoot up, but outraged upon discovering that he couldn't move.

"Get off, meathead!" he groused. "You're too heavy."

And Angeal, in his true, stingy selfishness, just threw another arm over Sephiroth and let out a contented, obnoxious snore.

By the time Angeal finally got up, it was already ten and Sephiroth was already grumpy.

But that was totally normal.

They ate breakfast at the small, cramped coffee table; the dinner table was broken, and Angeal didn't think it was necessary to spend that much money to buy a new one. Sephiroth glared at his toast and swore at the television, and Angeal was stingy with the sugar in his coffee and the kisses he laid on the side of Sephiroth's potty-mouth.

Normal.

Being Ebenezer Scrooge didn't actually fit someone like Angeal. In fact, Angeal was more known to be a kindly sort of person, forever helping people across streets and kissing babies. The only thing was the fact that he wasn't frozen to bits _inside_…more just in the hand that wrapped around his wallet.

Sephiroth was more like the Grinch, forever grumping and grouching with anything Christmas related. He hated the cheery lights around the house because he couldn't sleep, he hated the songs because they were too wholesome, and he hated the holiday cheer that everyone seemed obsessed with when it was too cold to do anything but lie around at home. Angeal, however, wouldn't stand for that. They were going to conquer their holiday aversions, venture out into the snowy day, and buy all the holiday gifts that they were behind on.

The carolers came at eleven.

Sephiroth's nose was already pasted to the window, scowling down at the happy flushed faces warbling famous song lines.

"The little freaks," he snarled. "Doesn't anyone know it's the weekend and we want to sleep late?"

"There're from the charity," Angeal said absently, turning his pockets inside out. "I've got to have something to give them…"

"Look in your wallet, stupid," Sephiroth said snippily.

Angeal gave him a horrified look. "We _need _that money!"

Sephiroth said something rude, shrugging on his sweater; something ugly and brown and appropriately bah-humbug-ish. Angeal frowned deeply at him, looking him up and down before voicing his disapproval.

"We're not going out with you wearing that."

"Why the hell not?" Sephiroth snapped back. "It's itchy and makes me feel horrible."

Angeal was rummaging through his drawers, shaking his head without saying anything. Sephiroth crossed his arms, poking his lip out in a pout. He knew that he'd already lost, and Angeal wasn't going to let him get his way.

Angeal emerged with something fuzzy, red and white. Sephiroth's scowl deepened.

"It's in the holiday spirit," Angeal said.

"It's from the thrift shop," Sephiroth said. "Someone probably died in that. And then peed on it."

"I paid five dollars," said Angeal. "It's an expensive sweater."

Sephiroth snatched the offensive sweater, putting on a face to make Angeal feel appropriately cowed by his decision to make Sephiroth dress nicely. He pulled it over his head, crossed his arms again, and resumed scowling.

Angeal smiled one of his short, busy smiles, admiring Sephiroth. "Don't you feel better?"

"No," Sephiroth said sulkily. "I feel like frickin' Santa Clause."

And just to show how much he hated it, he made a point of putting on his dirtiest jeans.

Grabbing a jacket and Sephiroth's arm, Angeal headed for the door, already mumbling out the list under his breath. They had forgotten about the carolers, however, and they opened the door to be faced by a virtual sea of open, eager faces, mouths open in song.

Sephiroth opened his mouth, probably to say something rude, but Angeal stopped him, smiling sincerely until the song was wrapped up. At that point, one of the older teens of the group stepped forward with a hopeful smile.

"Good morning, sirs. We're trying to raise donations for new jackets for children. Would you like to make a donation?"

Angeal raised a hand, amicably digging in his pocket for his wallet. Sephiroth didn't even look at him incredulously; he was busy scowling at the sky, hoping that it wouldn't snow. That would certainly rain on the faithful Christmas-waiters parade, showing them that no white Christmas would be coming and all the preparations would have to go on without the legendary snows. Sephiroth smiled, an eerie-looking upturn of his lips.

Angeal made a triumphant sound, emerging with something…other than his wallet. Taking the teen's hand, he pressed something into the palm, leaning back with a contented smile. On the other hand, the teen looked confused, and then gradually shocked.

Sitting in the center of his palm was a single, shiny dime.

"There," Angeal said, and smiled as happily as if he'd just given the kid a winning lottery ticket.

The teen looked like he was about to protest, but Angeal was already busily locking the door. For Sephiroth, this was the perfect opportunity to cheekily grin at the kids and flip them off.

To hell with corrupting innocence.

Angeal, having done his good deed, didn't notice to scold Sephiroth. He was walking, already digging in his pocket again, looking for his wallet—for real this time. Sephiroth grabbed the arm that was digging, refusing to let go, and with a curse, Angeal began awkwardly using his opposite arm to dig in his opposite pocket.

Sephiroth supposed that they were headed for Wall Market. He didn't care where they were going, particularly, as long as there weren't very many Christmas couples. They made him sick.

All the way down the picturesque street, lined with cozy houses and tall, old trees, everyone had taken it upon themselves to prepare for Christmas. Every single house in the neighborhood was draped in happy Christmas lights and decorations. The snow that had fallen last week—all pretty much melted now—had left a frosty sheen over the entire scene, bright and cheerful as always.

And, as he did every December, Sephiroth was already plotting on how to ruin this holiday season, as much as possible, for everyone else. There were so many different ways. He could down the power lines. Hell, if he wanted to, he could take out the power plant! No more Christmas lights. No more Christmas specials.

Sephiroth smirked evilly. Every family in the city would be crowded into their family cars and local grocery stores, straining to just listen to their favorite Christmas carols.

Then his smirk abruptly dropped.

Taking out the power plant was his most brilliant idea yet…_but, _then, there would be no TV. And Angeal thought buying a generator was too much money.

Sephiroth scowled, clinging tighter to Angeal's arm, getting a grunt in response. He hated everything about Christmas.

Except for Angeal. Angeal could stay.

Angeal had finally located his wallet, tsking concernedly as he flipped through the multiple bills. "We don't have enough," he said sadly.

Sephiroth glanced at the wallet. "It looks like enough."

"We need this money," Angeal said. "We'll starve and have to live on the street."

Sephiroth shrugged. "Sounds cool."

He almost earned a glare from Angeal for that, but escaped by sole merit of Angeal finding an extra pocket in his wallet, flipping earnestly through the bills there. Honestly, the only thing they had to worry about was that someone would steal Angeal's wallet and they would go bankrupt because of that. Though, Sephiroth _did_ know that Angeal stored little pockets of money all over the house. He should know; under the mattress was Sephiroth's main source of video game money.

Sephiroth was getting tired of walking.

"Can we call a taxi?"

Angeal looked scandalized at the mere thought. "Of course not, Sephiroth."

Sephiroth thrust out his lower lip in a pout that looked more dangerous than petulant.

"It's too much money," Angeal continued, closing his wallet back up.

And that was the end of that.

Sephiroth really, really didn't like Christmas.

At least they'd ended up on a busier stretch of street. Cars putted by, Christmas trees strapped tightly to the tops, while children clung to their parents, cheeks flushed red as they clutched shopping bags. The entire scene was disgustingly wholesome. And, sure enough, Christmas couples walked arm in arm, beaming up and down at each other.

Sephiroth was sorely tempted to tell them to "get a room", but that would mean venturing out of Angeal's arm, which he was loathe to let go of. So instead he hoped, with all his might, that something detrimental would happen to their day...such as a passing bird causing an accident on them, for instance.

They did go through this every year. None of Sephiroth's wishes ever came true.

The stores on the street had taken on a more traditional view, decked with lights and cheery drapes of red and green streamers. The sidewalk was busy, but not crowded, which Sephiroth was glad of, because he wouldn't brush shoulders with any skipping people. The very thought was repulsive.

It was while they were walking between two of the stores—the Toy Store and the Candy Store, Sephiroth thought—and Angeal once again was worriedly peering into his wallet, that Sephiroth's narrowed eyes honed in on something in particular.

His hands and nose pressed up against the glass of the Toy Store, eyes wide, stood a very short, very young little boy. He was threadbare and despicably dirty, with big blue eyes and a mop of blond hair…he looked like the sort that Angeal would quickly shower in donations. As they walked by, the kid looked right up at them, eyes growing impossibly bigger. He sniffed a gob of snot back up into his nose.

Sephiroth wrinkled up his own nose in disgust.

The proper thing to do, undoubtedly, would be to shower the kid in money and affection for being so worn and sad-looking during the season of giving. Or at least, that's what Sephiroth thought from the movies he'd seen.

Sephiroth didn't _do _the proper thing, though. He was with Angeal because Angeal was big and smiley and sometimes annoyed him to death, and mainly because he was a man, and proper people dated people of the opposite sex. He wore his hair long because normal guys didn't really do the overboard length he did. He scowled and frowned and cussed because it usually drew him scowls and frowns and cusses back.

Sephiroth wasn't conventional. Like hell he was going to conform because of one kid.

At the moment, Angeal was busy peering into his wallet, a worried, stingy downturn to his lips already, so he didn't even notice the kid. And Sephiroth? Sephiroth just decided that he didn't very much _like _threadbare little boys with big wide eyes.

So he sneered at him briefly, turning away and clinging tighter to Angeal. The entire time they walked by, the kid just kept staring at them with impossibly big eyes, probably to get them to look over and "aw" or slip him money, but Sephiroth wasn't falling for it. In fact, when he looked back, the kid was still staring after them.

Sephiroth felt like flipping him off too, but then that might mean that Angeal would notice. So he settled for sticking his tongue out instead.

The kid blinked.

._._._.

Wall-Market was draped in lights, red, green and white, and looked like a festive Christmas tree. Happy gaggles of giggling friends trooped in and out, carrying packages, pushing shopping carts, and looking like they were having a jolly ol' time at the entire thing.

It was absolutely sickening.

From when they hit the parking lot, Angeal went into full out stealth mode. They did this every year-Angeal versus the Salvation Army guy. Angeal wanted to keep his money, the other man wanted to take it, and Sephiroth wanted absolutely no part of it. That didn't mean, unfortunately, that he didn't end up getting involved.

Angeal burrowed his chin and mouth into his jacket collar, pulling his hat down low over his eyes. His eyebrows knitted together in furious, self-righteous concentration. He reached over to fix Sephiroth accordingly, but Sephiroth smacked his hand. Like hell he was going to hide from a stupid guy who wanted donations.

"If we sneak in," Angeal mumbled, "Maybe he won't see us."

This was a stupid assumption. Tseng always saw them. Tseng saw everything. Mostly, though, he had his eye on Angeal's bulging wallet, which Sephiroth didn't exactly blame him for. After all, Sephiroth usually had his eye on it too. That was a lot of money to be carrying around at one time.

For a moment, as the automatic doors slid open in front of them, it looked like they were going to be able to start off their shopping on a good note. Angeal steered them both towards the door.

They were stopped by an arm chopping down in the air in front of them.

Tseng stood to the side, a reserved, devilish _thought you were going to get away? _smile on his lips. Angeal sighed in disappointment, straightening up and forcing a smile onto his face. Sephiroth didn't bother with smiling.

"Hello Angeal. Sephiroth." Tseng nodded politely in each of their directions respectively. "Happy Holidays."

"Happy Holidays," Angeal mumbled back, scuffling his shoe half-heartedly.

His arm still stretched in front of them, Tseng turned to Sephiroth. "I trust you have been well?"

Sephiroth grumbled something that sounded suspiciously like _go suck a frozen light post, _but after an elbow in the ribs, spat out an "I've been alive."

"Mr. Hewley," Tseng said, fully ignoring Sephiroth. "As you know, several distressing events have happened this year. The children need care." As he spoke, he was inching closer and closer to Angeal. Angeal, eyes narrowing now, was backing away. Sephiroth, as he was now pinned to Angeal's arm, tripped over his feet and cursed the entire bloomin' holiday for putting him here.

Tseng's eyes were narrowed now, too. "Perhaps you would think it a good deed to donate _some_ money to the children this holiday season? You have more than enough for yourself. Just imagine children with a new place to sleep, food to eat, warm clothes…"

"I don't have any money to spare," Angeal interrupted. "I already donated to a charity at home, and I need to get my shopping done." He winced afterwards, probably thinking about how callous that sounded. Sephiroth twisted a finger in his ear idly.

"Your wallet," Tseng said, his voice dropping a few dangerous octaves, "Is _filled_ with bills. Every single _year_, your wallet is filled with bills. And it wouldn't harm you to just—"

He suddenly lunged forward, quick fingers reaching for Angeal's pocket, but Angeal was ready. He leaped back, clocking Tseng's shoulder, before he grabbed Sephiroth's arm and pulled him through the doors and into the crowd.

"Turks!" Tseng barked from somewhere behind them, and Angeal pulled Sephiroth along faster.

"Stop it," Sephiroth complained. "You're going to pull my arm out of my socket."

Angeal tugged them into the greeting cards, peering out from behind the flowered _Get Well Soon _selections. "There are going to be hundreds of them now," he mumbled. "They'll be the ones in the navy blue suits. Always after my money."

"Let's go home, then." Sephiroth finally found something in his ear, stared at it, and then discreetly discarded it on a nearby Christmas card in an ugly brown smear. He smiled at it in satisfaction. "No one we know really needs a present anyway. They're all freeloaders."

Angeal glared at him.

"Fine," Sephiroth mumbled. "Let's get the stupid presents."

The mall, other than the first meeting with Tseng, was just like its outward shell. The only difference was that no one was smiling. Everyone had their own individual shopping carts, surrounded by their children and shopping carts and respective significant other. Everyone was on their cell-phones, texting or arguing at someone on the other end.

Sephiroth examined the whole scene with immense approval. Angeal, however, was stressed.

"We only really have a few people who need something," he muttered, dodging a screaming kid. "And then we can get extra just in case we forgot something."

"Let's give Hollander what he gave us last year," Sephiroth suggested. "He practically can't remember his own frickin' name; he wouldn't even remember what it looked like."

Angeal stared at him.

Sephiroth stared back, an evil smile curling his lips at the corners.

"It would save _money_," he purred—he was playing the sinful card. His smirk widened when he saw Angeal visibly swallow nervously.

"No!" Angeal said, too loudly. "We'll get him a new gift! The very _thought_!" ….was way too appealing.

Sephiroth slumped, though the mere fact that Angeal was _considering_ it was brightening his day. "It would save a lot of money," he repeated again. "And the thing is useless anyway. We don't even know what it is. For all we know, it could be some sort of recording device."

Angeal stopped in his tracks. "No it wasn't," he said, though he looked unsure.

"Did you put it in the bedroom?" Sephiroth asked snippily. "Hollander sure would've gotten a show."

"We don't _do _anything in the bedroom!" Angeal snapped back. "In fact—"

He swiveled, intending to keep walking, only to come face to face with a very scandalized mother. She pointedly clapped her hands over her son's ears, steering him in the other direction.

Angeal cleared his throat, his cheeks flushing. "We don't do anything in the bedroom," he whispered in a lower voice. "I think I hid it somewhere in the bathroom."

"Even better," Sephiroth grumbled. "I still say we give it back to him."

Angeal didn't protest this second time, which probably meant he was considering it. Sephiroth was momentarily pleased. Hollander could ogle his own shriveled behind for all he cared.

._._._.

First stop was the video game area.

Angeal narrowed his eyes in concentration, scanning every game system with the befitting shrewdness of a miser. Each one was over a hundred gil, and Angeal was going to get the cheapest one if it killed him. Sephiroth, chewing on a section of his hair, was shuffling through the clearance games to see if there were any first person shooters.

There weren't.

Bored, Sephiroth shuffled back to Angeal, shoved a lady and her daughter aside, and peered over his shoulder. "Get him a SOLDIER First Class."

Angeal looked up. His eyes were slits now. "Those things are one hundred _fifty."_

Sephiroth narrowed his eyes right back. "Zack has every other version. Buy him a new one so I can steal it and actually be able to play games."

"Sephiroth…"

"I'm not wearing deodorant," Sephiroth hissed. "Don't make me sweat."

Angeal pinched the bridge of his nose, looking ready to explode. A small circle opened up around them politely, trying to avoid the men's wrath.

"Okay, Sephiroth," Angeal said, in an overly patient voice. "I will get Zack this, but not for you. What game should I get him?"

"Anything with a girl on the cover," Sephiroth said, a little too quickly. "Especially if it has 'cooking' or 'baking' in the title."

"_Mako 3_ it is then," Angeal decided.

"You didn't friggin' buy _me Mako 3_!" Sephiroth burst out now. "That's just bloody unfair!"

"I bought you _Materia 2_!" Angeal protested. "And it was expensive!"

"It was friggin' _used_," Sephiroth snarled. "It was fifteen _gil! _To hell with this, and you! I'm leaving."

Angeal turned his back on him. "Meet up at self-serve cash register nine."

"I won't!" Sephiroth spat at Angeal's back. "And see who carries your bags home for you!"

Angeal was busily talking to the attendee now, ignoring Sephiroth. Furious, Sephiroth slammed his foot down and then stamped noisily off. See if he cared what Angeal did. Angeal could shop on his own.

Sephiroth drifted into the hub of the mall, down along the microwave aisle, and over into the main Christmas area. Here, huge plastic snow globes sprayed fake snow, and gangly, pimply elves walked about, permanent scowls on their faces. Sephiroth scuffled along, a scowl of his own firmly in place. He noticed the end of a long line, and after looking around and deeming it the most interesting thing in the area, wandered over to see what was up.

Everyone in the line was half his size, and many pairs of big, wide eyes looked up at him while he casually stood to the side; Sephiroth was instantly reminded of the blonde threadbare kid, and wrinkled his nose up in disgust. The line was made of several little kids, some clutching white pieces of paper in hand. What was the big deal, then? It was all leading to a big chair on a platform, a red and gold gilded…chair…

Oh shoot.

Sephiroth scowled at the chair. He remembered now. The Santa Clause imposters. Yet _another _reason to hate Christmas.

That was it. Sephiroth was off this line. His scowl now firmly back in place, Sephiroth made for a quick escape…

…only to be stopped by a gangly elf stepping in his path.

Sephiroth looked down at him, face crinkling up in disgust. "Out of my way, munchkin."

The gangly elf looked up at him. "Are _you _supposed to be filling in for Santa Clause #2?"

Sephiroth blinked.

"Hurry up," the elf said, "They're getting antsy." He squinted up at Sephiroth. "You don't have the beard, but the sweater will pass this once. Come on."

And, saying that, the elf took his arm and led him up past the whole line of big eyed children. He pushed him into the chair, nodded in satisfaction, and left.

Just as Sephiroth was working up the appropriate rude thing to say to this new situation, something was plopped in his lap. Sephiroth snapped his head down, face worked into a glare.

Looking up at him with huge eyes was a baby, three maybe, mouth wide open. Sephiroth felt warmth on his leg, and crinkled his nose up in disgust. He prided himself on being scary, but having someone pee their pants was better when they were far enough away for him to enjoy it without getting messy.

Good thing the child was wearing a diaper.

Lifting the child gingerly under the arms, Sephiroth placed him back on the floor, brushing off his leg. He made for a quick escape, but found his pathway blocked, yet again.

"To hell with being Santa," he snapped, not even looking up. "You can be friggin' Satan and have kids pee on your lap."

When there was no response, Sephiroth looked back, fully intent on socking the guy, before he paused.

Navy blue suit, head to toe. Tie neat and tidy around neck.

Oh. Hell.

"I don't have his money," Sephiroth said sharply. "If I did, I wouldn't be in this godforsaken mall in the first place."

The guy was wearing sunglasses; Sephiroth thought that he'd seen him once or twice at the grocery store before, on more neutral terms. Now, though, the guy smacked a fist into an opened hand, probably because he hadn't heard what Sephiroth had said.

Sephiroth hated Christmas.

He never retreated from an argument, but he was pretty certain that Angeal wouldn't like him getting in a brawl with a Salvation Army officer, even if said officer was trying to roughhouse money out of him. So, he called in a tactics retreat, grabbed a kid and shoved it at the Turk, and ran like cheery carolers were after him. Obviously, even though Angeal was being a jerk, it was safer to stay around him.

._._._.

By the time Sephiroth had shaken the Turk off his tail and reached the cashiers to meet up with Angeal, he actually felt bad about the way he'd yelled at him. Angeal had had to brave the entire Christmas shopping ordeal by himself, without Sephiroth's obscene commentary the entire way. So what if Angeal didn't buy him_ Mako 3?_ He could take the mattress-money and come back later. No problem.

Sephiroth fell in with Angeal at cashier nine, as Angeal had said, and grudgingly looped arms. Angeal smiled thinly, pressing a quick stingy kiss to Sephiroth's ear as he stared forlornly at his purchases. Sephiroth, having had established his presence, wandered off while Angeal mourned his money.

Then he saw it; a way to make up the entire 'running off in anger' thing he'd just pulled on Angeal.

Waiting for his mother, obviously bored, was a pre-teen. He was all lanky limbs, earbuds and floppy hair—not very much to look at. Sephiroth wasn't looking at him, though; he was looking at the shopping bag. Through it, he could _clearly _see…

Darting over, Sephiroth snatched the bag and ran back over to Angeal. An outraged cry came from behind him, and then the kid was after him, screeching something about those being his.

"Look, Angeal," Sephiroth said, holding up the bag triumphantly. "You don't have to pay anymore. He has _Mako 3 _AND _Materia 2. _You could give them to Zack!" The kid reached for the bag, and Sephiroth smacked his hand away. "Stop touching my stuff! Loser."

The teenager looked back over to Angeal, obviously asking for justice.

Angeal put something in his plastic bag, hands shaking. After a moment, he cleared his throat. "You have…_Mako 3."_

The teenager staredat him.

Angeal looked helplessly over at Sephiroth, whose eyes were narrowed in a _if you pass up this chance, you're on the couch _sort of way. He looked back at the teenager, who seemed ready to scream bloody murder. Finally, he sighed. He took the bag back from Sephiroth, handing it to the kid. "Sorry for the trouble. Happy holidays."

The kid snatched back the bag, looked warily over at Sephiroth, and darted off. Sephiroth glowered at Angeal.

"That was sixty gil you could've saved right there. Butthead."

Angeal sighed, handing a bag over to Sephiroth.

"Wasn't it tempting, though?" Sephiroth wheedled. "You could've saved a lot of money."

"I could've saved a lot of money," Angeal said wearily, "If I weren't so concerned about saving a lot of money, Sephiroth." He finished packing the last bag, leaning on the scale for a moment and rubbing his face.

"_Please remove all items from the bagging area," _the computer informed them. Somewhat concerned, Sephiroth tugged at Angeal's arm, pulling him away from the scale.

"C'mon, stupid," he said quietly. "Let's go get some coffee."

._._._.

The coffee shop in the mall was crowded, but Sephiroth managed to scowl out a table, where he plopped Angeal down. Angeal, predictably, ordered the cheapest coffee he could. Sephiroth ordered a hot chocolate that looked too rich for him to drink, that probably wiped out all his money for a while. They were the perfectly odd gay couple in a sea of heterosexual romance. Sephiroth felt appropriately unique.

Angeal took a sip of his cheap coffee, made a face, and discreetly put it back on the table. Sephiroth took a sip of his own drink, snorted, and then grabbed Angeal's hand in a painful hand-grip so it wouldn't look like he cared.

This seemed to be the thing that made Angeal spill.

"Did you…ever feel like you're missing the whole point?" Angeal began warily, swirling his coffee around his cup.

"Of life? That someone's bringing Christmas around every year for your own misery?" Sephiroth asked coldly. "All the time."

Angeal gave him an odd look, and then shook his head. "No. That you're missing the whole point of _Christmas."_

"No," Sephiroth said.

"Oh." Angeal swirled his coffee harder. "I just feel like…it's just centered on buying presents. No warm feelings, no real singing, just swirling around worrying about spending money. I mean…I didn't even want to donate to that Salvation Army man—"

"Is this what this is all about?" Sephiroth said incredulously. "You're feeling guilty because you didn't donate to that rat?"

Angeal smiled sheepishly.

"Aw, this is just crap." Sephiroth took the coffee cup from Angeal, sliding it out of his reach, and slid his hot chocolate over to Angeal instead. "I may not like Christmas, but I don't think it's about the money you give to donations. I think it's about what you enjoy doing. And if you're enjoying what you're doing, to hell with what everyone else thinks. You are you, and that's all that matters."

Angeal stared at him. "Sephiroth. That was actually…kind of sweet."

"Don't get used to it," Sephiroth said quickly, brushing it off. Still, though, before he could stop them, a quick flash of warmth rushed to his cheeks. He clapped his hands over his face, but Angeal's smile made him pretty sure he'd seen it. Scowling, he pushed back from the table. "Let's go home."

Angeal got up too, stretching, and hesitating a moment before saying, "I'll get the bill."

While Angeal handled the money, Sephiroth licked around the entire rim of his coffee cup, added in a dash of salt, and then wore his most charming grin while offering it as a free sample.

Hey. He couldn't go all good after that speech.

They walked out the same way they came, arm in arm. Tseng was still standing there, and made pointed eye contact with them as they came out. Angeal, though Sephiroth squeezed his arm until it hurt, still begrudgingly dropped a twenty in the donation box.

Tseng smiled.

On the way home, the stores lit up like fireflies, much to Sephiroth's disgust. Even more disgusting was the fact that little flurries began falling, slowly at first, and then faster as the walk continued.

It seemed like everything Sephiroth hated was coming true.

While they were walking between the Toy Store and the Candy Store, again, Sephiroth found himself searching for the threadbare little boy, almost against his will. Some part of him had been maliciously hoping that he would've gone home and changed into his new, fancy clothes, smirking at how he'd fooled everyone. But, instead, the kid was curled up in a ball between the two shops, unintentionally shivering. No one had given him any money.

There is a difference of reports, but it is said that Sephiroth's heart grew two whole sizes that day.

Pulling Angeal back, Sephiroth rudely shoved the kid with his foot. He almost thought he was dead, until two blue eyes peered up at him.

"What's your name?" Sephiroth asked.

The boy blinked. "Cloud," he said softly.

"Why aren't you home?"

"I don't have one."

Sephiroth reached down, pulling on Cloud's arm. "Come with me," he said, and tugged him upwards. Cloud looked a little frightened, pulling back, but Angeal took the other one, and together, they dragged Cloud back home, looking appropriately like child kidnappers to anyone who saw them.

Cloud, of course, had good reason to be frightened, but there was nothing more dangerous than Sephiroth deadset on doing a good deed. Into the house he was dragged, where Sephiroth shed his sweater and shoved it over his head, and Angeal gave him a pair of too big socks. A fluffy toy of some kind was put in his hands, and before he even knew what had properly happened, he was on the couch in-between Angeal and Sephiroth, eating lukewarm pizza.

A little while later, with Cloud curled up in the guest bedroom, Sephiroth groaned, banging his head against the back of the couch.

"I fed him," he said blandly. "I fed him, and now he's never going to go away."

Angeal smiled at him, giving him a warm, sweet kiss on the end of the nose. "But don't you feel a little bit better about yourself now, Sephiroth? This seems like it's going to actually be a good Christmas to remember, isn't it?"

"No," Sephiroth said. "I don't feel better about myself. And this is just another stupid Christmas."

The Grinch was a terrible liar.

He lied every year.

_fin._

._._._.

**A/N: **First completed Christmas fic ever. :3

Written for http:(space)/(space)/(space)proj-ff7xmas(dot)livejournal(dot)com/2937(dot)html, prompt "Warmth" (add the dots, remove the spaces). Go and look through it; the moderator, xiaa, did an awesome job of organizing and planning, and it's really cool and fun to look through. :) There is some explicit content, I think, so be careful. AND YES, PASS ON THE WORD SO EVERYONE CAN LOOK AT IT AND READ IT AND STUFF, MAYBE SEND A NOTE TO THE AUTHORS/ARTISTS YOU LIKE AND MAKE SURE THIS CAN HAPPEN AGAIN. Yah know. S'cool.

Had too much fun writing this, even though at one point I wanted to kill it dead. For research, I checked out (again) a beautiful illustrated copy of "A Christmas Carol" and "How the Grinch Stole Christmas", which I virtually used none of, but instead sobbed over. My librarian was smirking at me. SO WHAT, I'M CHECKING OUT CHRISTMAS STORIES IN DECEMBER.

Yes. Thanks for reading this if you did! :D And remember, even if you _didn't like this story_ (sawbs) check out the anthology and _send love to someone else_. I'm pretty sure they'll appreciate your gushes. :)

Okay I'll stop now with the advertising.

NO WAIT

Did you know that if you mix around the letters in "Santa", you get "Satan"? D: Who is really climbing down our chimneys? How exactly are we paying for our presents? With our _souls?_

Now I'll stop. _Beware Christmas Day, guard your soul_…and have happy, safe winter holiday, whatever you celebrate! :D


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